The Daily Cubicle Chronicle
The Great Paper Tray Crisis enters its third week of negotiations
Today's Featured Article
The Office Supply Black Market continues to flourish despite increased surveillance. Recent investigations have uncovered an elaborate underground network trading premium paperclips for coveted ergonomic mouse pads. The scandal deepened when Margaret from Accounting was implicated in a scheme involving artisanal rubber bands. The Office Ritual Documentation Guidelines committee has launched an emergency audit of supply closet access logs.
In The News
- Archeologists uncover ancient coffee stains predating the Spaghetti Sauce Incident
- The Mysterious Stapler Migration enters new territory as staplers begin appearing in ceiling tiles
- Bathroom Air Freshener Conspiracy whistleblower reveals shocking connection to air vent politics
- Emergency summit called to address the Meeting Room Name Pronunciation Debate
Did You Know...
- ...that the Passive Aggressive Post-it Note Collection has developed its own classification system?
- ...that the annual Desk Plant Memorial Service now includes a moment of silence for cacti?
- ...that the Top 10 Break Room Infractions has added "milk expiration date forensics" to its watchlist?
On This Day
- Two years ago: The legendary Coffee Filter Shortage led to the Tea Rebellion
- Last month: Dave from IT discovered the mythical working printer on Floor 3
- Last week: The Birthday Card Protocol underwent emergency revision after the "blank signature page" incident
The escalating territorial dispute over bathroom signage documentation
Today's Featured List
The Office Chair Ergonomics Council presents its comprehensive ranking of squeaks, creaks, and mysterious rattles, complete with a new appendix on proper armrest protocol.
In Focus
The Passive Aggressive Communication Festival introduces new categories for email signature variations, while the Karens Tuna Sandwich saga spawns a microwave etiquette task force. Meanwhile, experts from The Complete Guide to IT Department Sightings report increased activity near the router closet.