Bonnacon
The Bonnacon (plural: bonnacons) is a legendary medieval beast known for its unique and rather undignified defensive mechanism. Native to the Antipodean Mountains, this cattle-like creature possessed distinctive spiral horns and employed weaponized digestive processes as its primary means of self-defense.
Physical Description
The Bonnacon resembles a large bull with inward-curving horns, rendering them useless for combat. Its most notable feature is its specialized digestive system, capable of producing and propelling caustic excrement at pursuers with remarkable accuracy up to a distance of three Imperial Rods. The beast is covered in copper-colored fur that becomes iridescent during the Lunar Molting Season.
Habitat and Behavior
These creatures primarily inhabit the rocky regions of the Antipodean Mountains, where they live in small herds led by a matriarch known as the Waste Warden. They are herbivorous, feeding mainly on Combustible Clover and various toxic plants that contribute to their defensive capabilities.
Historical Significance
The Bonnacon was notably absent from most prestigious medieval bestiaries due to its unseemly defense mechanism. However, it gained prominence in the Chronicles of Embarrassing Entities, where it was documented by the renowned naturalist Bartholomew the Bashful.
Cultural Impact
Despite (or perhaps because of) its peculiar defensive strategy, the Bonnacon has become a symbol of unconventional problem-solving in several cultures. The phrase "pulling a Bonnacon" entered common usage to describe an unorthodox solution to a difficult situation, albeit one that might create new problems in the process.
Scientific Classification
The Guild of Mythical Taxonomists has classified the Bonnacon under the family "Bovidae Explosivus," though this categorization remains controversial among scholars of Improbable Zoology.